Pottermania, Touaregs and floods

This was so much easier than searching for horcruxes to kill Lord Voldemort. Daniel Radcliffe, aka Harry Potter, spent his 18th birthday and the four days leading up to it at Lord's, taking in the first Test between England and India, and failed to even draw a blink from Sachin Tendulkar and Andrew Strauss when he asked them for autographs. "They were doing the thing that I do when I am in a crowd of people, which is to just keep your head down and keep moving as you sign," Radcliffe, sporting an England replica shirt, told the BBC's Test Match Special. "The tabloid newspapers expected me to have some massive, extravagant birthday bash with lots of celebrities but that is not my thing. Just to come here was a bit of a dream, really. I have never been to a cricket match before. I am 18 today and I'm very excited." Book seven is out, faithful readers are happy with how the phenomenally successful series about a young wizard came to a close, the fifth installment of the movie is running to packed houses, and you're now legal to buy alcohol. Goodbye, Hogwarts.

Sales pitches just keep getting better. An advertisement for an "Off-Road Experience Day with Cricketers" this past week from Volkswagen invited would-be buyers to have a spin in a Touareg 4x4 with ... drum roll ... Chris and Stuart Broad. Drivers will get to test the vehicle to its limits on testing climbs and drops, side-slopes and "elephant" footprints. Both the Broads will remain in separate cars, but let's have some fun and imagine if everyone was in one car. Oh, there's mileage on this: "Lovely traction-control system on this one, eh Stuart? Shortens the braking distance by up to 20 per cent on loose surfaces. Is that a 620 watt Dynaudio system? So Chris, why did you smack the stumps out at Sydney? Whoops, pothole!"

Speaking of cricketers and automobiles, here's a rich one. Marcus Trescothick (remember him?) declared himself unavailable for September's Twenty20 World Championship in South Africa as well as England's winter tours of Sri Lanka and New Zealand, and was promptly handed a new shiny car, an Audi Q7, by Europcar UK, for whom he has been an ambassador since 2003. What next? Custom-made Fredalos?

Worcestershire have it bad this year. Stuck in the middle of what is set to be the wettest cricket season on record, they may not play at New Road all summer because the playing area has been under water for weeks. The management estimates the cost of the floods already stands at ₤500,000, and the players had to share kits during a match against Surrey at Guilford. Director of cricket Steve Rhodes, who found his laptop destroyed after swimming into his office to try and salvage electrical equipment, said it was an "act of God" that made life hell for the side. "There has been around four feet of water in the dressing room where the players store a lot of their kit and equipment. The floods also got into the lock-up where most of the training gear is kept and caused a lot of damage. The situation will cause us a bit of a logistical nightmare but we all pull together and get through it." When it rains, it pours.

Speaking of Worcestershire, Cricinfo's Jenny Thompson went to Guildford (rather greedily) to see them play Surrey. Phil Jaques told her that Gareth Batty had had to stay at his house because of the floods. Now this is the same Gareth Batty who got into difficulties while surfing in Sri Lanka in 2003 and had to be rescued. What is it with him and water? Rumours that he was driving (steering?) the Fredalo back during the World Cup have yet to be confirmed.

He left Bangladesh. India ignored him. Pakistan overlooked him. But now Dav Whatmore has been signed on by Emerging Media as director of the cricket academy for the second season of Cricket Star, a popular reality show in India. One can imagine that coaching obscure aspirants would be easier than international cricketers. And some visibility in the bargain too!

'Seek and you shall find'. The Ontario Cricket Association may have had that motto in mind when they requested former citizenship and immigration minister Mike Colle for a donation of $150,000 for a provincial multicultural grants programme. To their surprise, they received $1 million instead. According to a report, Colle decided on that amount because in his opinion $150,000 "wasn't enough". The cricketers even admitted they did not need that much dough, but were stuck with it. They dropped $20,000 on a party to celebrate the grant, but still could not find any immediate use for half of it. They have now decided to put it into a five-year guaranteed investment certificate. Not that that would have done much to calm irate taxpayers, or to promote the game in Canada.

"My kids don't keep their room very clean but I don't kick them out of home."
Darren Lehmann hopes Australia's Centre of Excellence has not over-reacted by sending three players home for strewing litter on their carpet.